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How to Get Over a Loss and Start Dating Again

by Louise W. Rice

We go through different types of loss in our lives. We fear losing loved ones as they reach old age. Also, we move in and out of relationships with people, including family members, friends, co-workers, and acquaintances. Part of this regular social interaction involves deep exchanges with people. At times, you learn more about a person and feel intense emotions, but time and space can separate you. When you’re close, no matter how much time passes, you always feel intimacy when reconnecting with a special person. You feel appreciated, loved, and valued. The intense bond reassures you, which every human being needs to feel.

Coming out of your shell and starting dating again after you’ve become a widow or widower is, least to say, difficult, as the sense of loss changes your whole world. You feel hard-pressed to adjust your mindset. Grief leaves you wondering how you will move on and rebuild a new life without your beloved partner, who used to provide emotional intimacy and companionship. Try these 5 tips to start your life anew after losing a spouse. Getting back into dating ensures you aren’t alone.

Tips for Dating After Loss

1. Give yourself time to heal

It can take months or years to move through the stages of grief. Allow a professional to help needed to work through emotions and issues related to loss. If your partner left unresolved problems, and it’s hard to find closure when you cannot speak to him or her again.

2. Let go of the past

This shift of your mindset will help you realize that your next partner or love interest will not compare to your deceased spouse. He or she is a new person with different qualities, past experiences, values, and needs. Embrace the newness of your partner.

3. Be yourself

Regrets from past relationships might influence how you approach dating this time around. It’s important to realize that you’ve grown and changed through the years. Chin up! You can offer new things to a partner based on your life journey, including developing increased strength and self-awareness. Be enthusiastic about how investing in new people can create strong bonds.

4. Welcome new experiences

When you start messaging a new person on a dating site, there is excitement as you’re both navigating unfamiliar territory. If your date suggests something outside your comfort zone, try it. What have you got to lose? You might love the new hobby or venue! For example, if you’re not into Asian food, but a date suggests sushi, just order a California roll, which contains vegetables only.

5. Share your story

Don’t give a new date the full story of the life you had with your partner. Summarize how the relationship ended and then focus on the good aspects of the relationship. This approach encourages the new person to feel positive that you’re ready for something different.

Moving Forward

It can feel strange to have deep conversations with a new person and reveal your likes, dislikes, and personal habits. Things will feel different between you and this love interest, and it will be tempting to compare them to the past. Also, there is a strong possibility your husband or wife who passed on was your twin flame. As the other half of your soul, which is deeper than a soulmate relationship, you shared similar goals and past traumas in this lifetime. Find the courage to move past your lost connection to the previous spouse and embrace a new one. There will be new joys and lessons to learn in this new chapter of your life. Don’t sit home alone for too many weeks and feel sad!

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