Why it is so important to be able to communicate on a date?
When you’re getting to know someone better, one of the key things you should be doing is communicating. From the moment you are flirting on a dating site or after meeting in some social setting, to your first dates, it’s all about developing chemistry via interesting anecdotes, exciting conversations, and flirty messages. Dates can be quite unnerving, especially if you or your partner are naturally shy, or have had disappointing romantic experiences recently.
There are many ways of capturing someone’s heart, through compliments or what are often referred to as ‘sweet nothings.’ But there are also things you should never say out loud (even if you are thinking them!).
1. You Look Great for Your Age
This is the classic example of saying one thing (that seems positive) but meaning something completely different (it’s a negative observation). Drawing someone’s attention to their age, a subject they might well be sensitive about, is so rude. They might be aware of an age-gap, and certainly don’t need you drawing attention to it.
2. My Ex Used to Say That, Too
Some things need to stay in the past, especially your dating history. If you were to use this phrase, the clear inference is that this other person is still on your mind. Making comparisons with your exes doesn’t bode well for your present relationship.
3. If Your Feelings were Genuine, You Wouldn’t …
This one sounds a little like emotional blackmail. Avoid this at all costs. Emotions are about sharing feelings and stoking chemistry. Not toying with for leverage.
4. What’s the Matter with You?
People often experience internal conflict. There may well be a reason for your partner being withdrawn or grumpy. By all means, try and get to the source of it, but do so subtly, displaying empathy.
5. Didn’t They Have that Jacket in Your Size?
So now you’re a fashion expert? Or you genuinely have no clue that drawing someone’s attention to the fact you have been dwelling on perceived ‘weight issues’ is extremely churlish? Just tell them you love the jacket.
6. If She isn’t Careful She’s Going to Spill out of That
Guys will observe other women in the vicinity displaying a lot of cleavage or wearing short skirts. This is natural and is down to hormones. Broadcasting that you have been paying close attention will only make your significant other seethe. With jealousy? Perhaps. With irritation at being regarded as second-best? Definitely.
7. What were You Saying There?
So, you’ve not been paying attention? One eye on your Twitter feed? Shame on you. Put that device away and get back into the room.
8. Is It that Time of Month?
This phrase should come with alarm bells. Or even an ejector seat that would plummet the culprit into a virtual freefall until they came to their senses. No woman can control biology and the natural mood swings that can occur. If she seems irritable because of her menstrual cycle, you must accept this.
9. Not Tonight
Life can sometimes get in the way of romance. Your partner might be eager to get down to some physical interaction, but after a stressful day, you just want to relax, grab some shuteye. Don’t ever say ‘not tonight,’ as if it’s you alone who might deign to let your other half know when the time would suit you. There are polite ways to explain any lack of libido. Just tell the truth.
10. I Love You
This might seem an odd choice for the 10, but the reason it’s listed is that this can seem trite if used too often. Tell someone you love them when you’re making love, or simply affirming your genuine feelings. Not to deflect their attention if you’ve done something requiring an apology.
People say the wrong things for all sorts of reasons. There is always scope for the recipient picking you up wrongly, especially if you’ve said something ambiguous. The crucial aspect is to be concise. Avoid words or phrases with double-meanings. After all, how would you feel if something all-too-easily misinterpreted was said to you?