There is a time and place for everything, but a lot of couples don’t know when to talk about money. According to experts of the website IGetNaughty, questions about money can kill the romantic atmosphere. That’s why you have to be very cautious when it comes to finances on a date. Read our tips, and you won’t ruin your dates by talking about money.
The First Date is the Worst Time to Discuss Money
Unless you two met at a conference for millionaires, you don’t want to talk about money on your first date. Even if both of you are rich, money shouldn’t be a topic on your first date. That will mark the direction in which your relationship will move. If you bring money up before the main dish, you’ll keep talking about it all the time. Your every date will be about money instead of about the two of you.
The first date with somebody is happening only once. Do you want to ruin it by talking about your income, debt, banks, and similar boring stuff? No, you don’t because you’ll never get a second date by doing that. Only if you’re very rich, but then you can be sure your partner isn’t there because of you. Money attracts them, and since you brought it up on the first date, money is the only quality you have. So avoid talking about many on a first date at all costs.
Chivalry vs Equality: Who Pays on a Date?
Splitting a bill? Does a man pay? Can a woman pay the whole bill on a date? This depends on a lot of things, but usually, men feel obligated to pay on dates. At least in the West. For example, couples in Japan are splitting a bill like it’s not a mortal sin, and nobody gets emasculated by that. That’s a true example of equality; money isn’t power there. Men aren’t less manly if they split a bill with their date. Still, most cultures worldwide are holding tight to the custom that a man pays for everything on a date.
That might look superficial at first, but it’s romantic. Men are showing that they’re capable of taking care of their girls by doing that. They also want to show they’re ready to spend hard-earned money to spend time with their partner. But in the last 10-20 years, women became more independent, so some women nowadays insist on splitting a bill. That’s great because it gives ladies the feeling of independence.
So, in the end, who should pay on a date? We suggest you always go for a bill if you’re a man, but read the situation. If she wants to split a bill, don’t be stubborn. Let her pay and treat her with a nice desert somewhere with the rest of your money. That will show you wanted to pay for everything, but you agreed to split a bill because you respect her. And taking her for a treat afterward will show your affection and determination again.
How and when Should You Discuss the Budget in a Relationship?
The money will come into discussion sooner or later in every relationship. You’ll mention how much you’re earning; your partner might even ask you that. There is nothing bad about that. Don’t run away from questions like that because you’ll either look like you’re ashamed or pride doesn’t let you talk about money. But don’t be the one who asks that, because the incomes of your partner are not your business.
The budget should be discussed when a relationship gets stronger, and you start planning things together. Of course, you have to know how your partner is with money if you’re planning to get married or looking to buy a house. It would be stupid to jump into a big expense like that without knowing anything about your partner’s finances. The exceptions to this rule are fresh relationships where both sides feel the chemistry, and they start living together shortly after meeting each other. If you find yourself in a situation like that, you have to discuss the budget to survives together.
Money is a hot topic in everybody’s life, but bringing it up on a first date is a rookie mistake. Don’t talk about money if you don’t have to. And don’t be conservative when it comes to paying in a relationship. Aim for something between chivalry and equality, but leaning a bit toward chivalry.